An Open Thank-You Letter to my Ex

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I found out you were cheating on me an hour before I had to be at work. That’s the first thing I would like to thank you for. You helped me learn how to handle my responsibilities, even when it felt like my whole world was falling apart. I walked away from you that day and into my job at the bar. I served drinks and food and smiles all night. I was a real pleasure, I bet, even though I had just found out the “love of my life” was kind of a real piece of garbage. I did what I had to do. I left that night with a broken heart, but a full wallet. Thank you for that.

You made me feel as if I had done something wrong, as if maybe I just wasn’t good enough for you. By doing that, although it hurt for a while and it took some time, you pushed me to realize that I wasn’t the problem at all. You were. I’m actually pretty awesome, and when it comes to the way I treat people in my relationships and friendships, my conscience is very clear. And that is a lovely feeling. This also made me see that, under no circumstance, should I ever let anyone make me feel as if I’m inferior or inadequate. Thank you for that.

You opened my eyes to just how much one person could manipulate someone else. How someone could take control over another person’s emotions, self-esteem, perception, and…well, life, basically. You were so unhappy with yourself that you needed to feel as if you at least were in charge of something (me). You have made me so relieved and thankful that I am nothing like you and I never want to be. I actually work on a daily basis to never be that type of person. Thank you for that.

You made me feel as if I needed you in order to be me. I was fully dependant on you, but after all, that’s kind of what you wanted. Since then, I have put in relentless effort to be the most independent and self-sufficient woman I can be. And it has worked. I am happy with myself and by myself, no matter what else happens. I don’t think I’ll have to worry too much about anyone destroying that because you unknowingly led me right to my discovery of inner-strength. Thank you for that.

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, you showed me the exact type of human being I do not ever want to be around. You showed me what it means to lack empathy, sensitivity, and, excuse me for being harsh, actual goodness. You illustrated all of the characteristics of someone I need to stay away from. Now I see clearly exactly what I deserve and don’t deserve and exactly who is suitable to be a part of my life and a part of my heart. You made it so much easier for me to spot a disingenuous, uncompassionate, selfish person, because you showed me exactly what that looks and acts like. You helped me see exactly what I wanted and what was best for me. By breaking my heart, you helped me find myself. I finally moved to the city of my dreams, I got my degree, I made wonderful friends, and met someone who I love more than I could have ever imagined. I really cannot thank you enough.

Kaitlyn Seabury | News Cult